I am so sorry to tell you this…BUT there will be some days where football sucks, it will not only just suck. It will ruin your day, it will ruin your night, it will make you doubt yourself, it may make you do none of these things, it may make you want to prove the naysayers wrong, it could do a lot of things BUT from my experience, there will be days where football is just going to SUCK and there is nothing really good to say about it. I understand the feeling too well and empathise with you. I can’t always tell you that it will be ok, because it won’t BUT I will give you hope. That it will only take one game, one game for everything to click for you to feel like you love the game again. And you do love the game. You just don’t like everything that comes with it.
Live with it, use it to be better. There will be a team for you, there will be, you just need to TRUST that with hard work you will get better and continue getting better.
On those days especially, I want you to be good to yourself (I know that it is easier said than done). I want you to really take in this blog post and UNDERSTAND that there are thousands of people out there who would LOVE to be you. However, that thinking does give me perspective but not enough these days. What keeps me going is being kind to myself. I watch my game, I take in what I can from feedback (I do not let people, even coaches perspectives drown my inner soul), I focus on what I did, what I can do better and I MOVE the hell on.
I forgive myself. Yes, that is right, I forgive myself for being so mean and having these expectations on myself. I move on and realise that I am my investment, and I will continue working on my craft. It will get better. It will get better.